Sunday, February 27, 2011

Warped Notion of Love

I've been reading a lot of blogs lately. And it's beginning to scare me just how warped people's notions of love is.

What I've gotten out of about 10 blogs and 90384034 Facebook/Twitter posts I've read lately are:

1) Fuck. Where's my boyfriend/girlfriend. He/She needs to be here with me NOW. RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!
2) My boyfriend/girlfriend cannot have female/male friends.
3) I control my boyfriend/girlfriend's facebook account. HE/SHE MUST NOT HAVE ANY FRIENDS FROM DIFFERENT SEX. NO!!!!!!
4) You better reply my message in the next 5 seconds or I will fucking rip you apart.
5) You have to be be my side like EVERY SECOND OF MY LIFE. I DON'T CARE!!!

My goodness. I am always tempted to tell these people to chill and that their boyfriends/girlfriends DO NOT FREAKING BELONG TO THEM. (But I am too nice for that. Ahem. No lah, actually because I just don't want to seem KPO)

But I've been seeing so many cases of these lately that I feel like I really just need to voice it out.

Come on people.

They are just your boyfriend/girlfriend. They are not your items. They are not things/people that you've purchased. They do not have to report to you every single second. They are not your possessions!

And have some confidence and self esteem please. Have some self-worth too please. Do you really think that 5 minutes or 5 seconds will make a difference to your relationship if your partner really decides to leave you? And do you really think that keeping him/her by your side every single minute and second will change things if he/she really didn't like you that much? Do you really think that by begging him/her to stay with you, things will be different and your relationship will be what you want it to be?

No.

The truth is... You can't force things to happen. You can't will things to happen. If they are not supposed to happen or if things are already at the point where it cannot be salvaged, then there's no point doing anything at all.

There's no point whining.
There's no point crying.
There's no point wishing.
There's no point trying to possess.

It's just pointless. If things are not meant to be, it won't be. Simple as that.

Have some self-worth. Don't do things just because you feel like this could possibly salvage your relationship. It doesn't. In fact, you are only being taken advantage of and being viewed as cheap.

Anyway, in summary: What I'm trying to say here is Love is more than possession. Love is understanding, love is giving and taking, love is compromising, love is caring, love is warmth, love is giving people warmth, love is giving that last morsel of your favorite food to him/her, love is being selfish, love is also not being selfish. Love is a huge contradiction. But I know for sure that love does not equate to possession.

I know for sure that love is not wanting someone. It is not needing someone. It is wanting and needing someone special to be the happiest person they can ever be.

Toodles.!

1 comment:

Beth said...

Thank God! Someone who agrees with me.

I could understand if you had a damn good reason for not wanting your significant other to talk to a certain person of the opposite sex, but to be paranoid of EVERYONE is just ridiculous. Not only does it mean that you have zero self-esteem but also that you don't trust your boyfriend/girlfriend, so why bother to be with them anyway?