Regret

Today's livejournal writer's block featured this question:

Which do you tend to regret more: things you wish you hadn't said or done or things you wish you had?

I thought this was a meaningful question and so I shall answer it here.

Whenever I do things (or not), I try to predict for any future regrets. If I think I might/will face any regrets in the future, I might most likely do it (or not do it depending on the scenario).

Many times, however... I still find myself regretting a lot. I regret about things I should have said or done, but never did. I regret about things I knew I should have bought, but never bought because I was too stingy with myself. I regret about the things I did, the things I say as well as the things I don't do or don't say.

I regret my impulsiveness as well as my lack of impulsiveness.

But I guess on the overall... I seem to regret my lack of impulsiveness more. You see... I am happiest when I am impulsive. I love the feeling of grabbing something off the shelf and buying it without having to look at the price tag. I love the feeling of hurting someone on impulse. I might feel bad... But on the overall, I feel pretty good. You see... I only hurt people who are mean to me. My words are hardly cutting to people I actually love.

But I do regret the words I accidentally say to the people I love when I am upset. I regret telling the boyfriend things that I think I should not have said. I regret telling my mother to not touch my stuff because I keep not being able to locate my items.

You see... Regret is a pretty complex term. It works both ways. It creeps onto you when you're being impulsive. Yet, it creeps onto yet again when you knew you could have done something about a situation, but did not do.

I realize I feel regret pretty often. I guess it's a feeling I need to get over. I read a quote once... Not sure where anymore. But I am pretty sure it said something about doing everything you want to do so as to avoid any regrets in the future.

I guess... On the overall... Being impulsive is still less regrettable than being non-impulsive. You can get rid of an impulsive purchase... But it is significantly less easy to want to buy something that is now out of stock because you were once non-impulsive.

I am not sure if what I say makes sense but right now... At 3AM, it's making a lot of sense to me. My answer to the question? I often regret about the things I do not say or do not do.

Toodles.